Before Jesus Changed My Life
Growing up, I was around worldly living and broken people all the time. When I was young, I would attend church pretty regularly with my family. I heard the good news of the gospel, but I never thought it was important to repent because I didn’t have consistent Christian influences I could connect with and look towards. I spent time at church camps, learning about the Bible and Jesus, but I never applied much of it to my life. The seed of the gospel was planted, but it kept getting suffocated by worldly things. I always said I was a Christian and knew of Jesus’ love, but I never could really understand what it meant to trust God and His will while also repenting and obeying. My constant thought was, “How could Jesus really love me unconditionally?” I was left feeling defeated and empty without Christ, stuck in a pattern of going to church, wanting change in my life, but never letting Jesus work in my life.
How Jesus Changed My Life
I became more active at church and youth groups throughout middle school. This was not because I truly believed Jesus would change me, but instead I was thinking that going through the motions would make me Christian– it didn’t work! By the time high school came around, I had stopped going to church except on holidays and started chasing unfulfilling worldly things like approval of peers, relationships, titles/accomplishments, and future plans. Going into my first year of college, some people from Salt found me and invited me to come along, so I decided to go. I went to a few Thursday gatherings, but I didn’t fully commit to it at first. I found reasons not to prioritize attending, and I wasn’t letting what was being preached change how I lived at all. I ended up hearing a sermon that was convicting, but I didn’t have the right heart posture and felt like I was being bossed around. In reality, I was being convicted of the sins I had committed. My friend Sarah kept planting the seeds of gospel truth, and finally, I wanted to commit. My second year at Kirkwood, I came back determined to live for Jesus. I started going to Salt every Thursday, joined a connection group full of great girls that I can confess to, and who keep me accountable. I also started attending church more regularly again and getting into my Bible consistently. Christ sent Sarah to share the gospel and Christ’s love with me because God sent Jesus to redeem us to himself. I finally understand the importance of biblical community. I am working on letting God lead me and entirely putting my life and schedule in His hands, according to his plan. I have realized that Jesus loves me, and he is the reason I am able to die to sin and be alive in Christ. All of this is because the Bible makes clear that “the wages of sin is death, but the free gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord” (Romans 6:23). Because of sin we were separated from God with no way over this bottomless pit, but God sent His Son to die for us and to pay the penalty of our sin. Jesus bridged the gap, and through repentance and belief, we can receive the free gift of salvation from God (Ephesians 2:8-10).
My Life After Jesus Saved Me
It’s been so sweet just to take a step back and see everything God has put in place for me. To be grateful for a community of people I can confess to and who keep me accountable. Through Bible reading, I realize the change that has happened in my life, including thinking, speaking, and acting in ways that please God. I know I have so much more to learn, but I know I don’t need to “earn” my baptism through knowledge, it’s through obedience and belief. Another thing I have seen big time is a renewal of mind and a remaking of my heart (Psalm 51:10). Everything society tells us is okay actually leaves us empty and broken-hearted. But with Jesus, we are able to receive the overflowing, plentiful love of God that we don’t deserve but are graciously given. Lastly, the most important, comforting thing to know is that I have a Heavenly Father who loves me and can’t wait to bring me home.