Before Jesus Changed My Life

I grew up in a house where we went to church almost every Sunday. I prayed “the prayer” and thought I was saved for so long. It wasn't until about high school that I started to see my need for a savior. In high school, I liked to try to be perfect, to obey my parents, and to be the best person I could be. Well, I did not, in fact, live up to that standard. I would push boundaries, and when I would cross them, this guilt and shame would come over me like no other. During my last couple of years of high school, I struggled immensely with my mental health. I tried everything to 'fix it,' but nothing really seemed to help. I turned to God a lot during this time and would beg Him to help me, but nothing seemed to be changing. It wasn't until I fully surrendered to God’s will (after knowing for a while I was holding something back) that I started to see God move. I broke up with my then-boyfriend and was forced to rely on God, and had no other way but to see my need for a Savior in my despair.

How Jesus Changed My Life

After I broke up with my then-boyfriend, things in my life slowly began to click. I remember being more in awe of God and wanting to know Him more. That summer, I worked at East Iowa Bible Camp as a way to be with friends for the summer, but God used it to truly change my heart. It was the weekend before the last week of camp, and I was spent. I was going to see family who I knew didn't believe in Jesus, and I knew just how hard of a weekend it was going to be. Elyssa Keffer had told me before I left to try to sabbath that weekend. Over the summer I had been taking more of the Bible’s teaching to my heart and it was on this drive home that it all clicked. The gospel finally made sense. The gospel is this: In the beginning God created the earth and when He created it, He also created man. Well, man did something that the Lord told them not to do, they sinned. So, God sent them out of the garden where life was everlasting and abundant and He put a curse on them where there would no longer be everlasting life but death and separation from God but told them there was a plan of redemption. Well throughout the whole bible we see our need for a Savior because of our sinfulness. In the new testament, a baby was born (the Messiah). He was perfect, He was the son of Man. He was sent to earth to atone for our sins. This man, Jesus, lived a perfect life. He was tempted, he was beaten, and yet he did not sin but instead remained faithful to the Lord. Jesus was then hung on the cross for our sins. He paid EVERY SINGLE ONE with His blood. He was the perfect sacrifice. This is who the Lord had planned for redemption. Jesus after dying was laid in a tomb and then three days later He rose again. This proved that not only did He pay for our sins but He defeated death. We no longer are separated from God, we can commune with Him. We don't need sacrifices or temples to go to His presence, instead we can receive the holy spirit because Jesus died on the cross making us clean so that we can enjoy God. In Romans 6:23 it tells us that “The wages of sin was death but the free gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus”, meaning that since we are sinners we deserve death but through Christ we can freely receive His gift of eternal life which is only possible through His death on the cross. 

My Life After Jesus Saved Me

My life is different now because I no longer seek others’ approval, and I know I cannot be perfect. I know that the goal of my life is no longer to seek the approval of others, to be perfect, or even to live the life I want to live, but rather it is all for the glory of God. I have surrendered my anxiety fully, only leaning on Him who says that He will give me peace beyond all understanding. Through coming to know Jesus and through my daily walk with Him, I am reminded of how weak and insufficient I am. One scripture I come back to often is 2 Corinthians 12:9-10, where Paul writes, “But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong.”. With going overseas this summer and just in nursing school, I am reminded constantly that I am weak, but He is strong. Jesus is my only hope in life and death, and now I know that He is sufficient for me in everything.